I have no doubt that worship occurs each week at our church from the hearts of those whose who seek to worship in spirit and in truth, but for me, yesterday was exceptional. The blend of young and old, both in human generation and musical style, was exactly what I've needed to be a part of for several months now. And the opportunity to not bear the burden entirely for leadership by sharing the role with the praise team made the experience even more grand and meaningful. This was particularly important because I've been fighting the drainage in my ears and throat, so my voice wasn't at full strength. God, however, was my strength in my weakness, and I was indeed able to sing without difficulty or strain. The excitement and joy I saw on some of the faces as we sang was evidence that their thirst was quenched, at least for this week. Darin's boldness in leadership made me so proud, too. He spoke with conviction and assurance that I can only believe was confidence in obedient service to the Lord. I guess that's what I felt, too. I've felt from the beginning that the order of worship for yesterday wasn't about my personal preferences, but rather, was given from the Lord - especially since so much of it came together during sleepless nights! When you know you are acting in obedience on what God has given, there is such freedom from criticism or disapproval. I don't really care if some didn't like what happened yesterday, because it wasn't my offering to them. That's especially significant for someone like me who is usually a people-pleaser and seeks the approval of others for validation. It's almost a sacred selfishness! But when you're thirsty and water's been made available, isn't it foolish to deny yourself its refreshment? For me, the obedience in singing those songs, in that manner, with those people yesterday was water to my soul. Thankfully, it wasn't that way for me alone, several others came forward to say that it met their need for worship from the heart, too. Thanks, Lord, for using me to be a part of your work.
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