Under His Watchful Eye

Apparently, for the first time in his short life, Dodger met a earthworm today. He was having some "outside" time (while I was inside getting a few things done without a puppy underfoot), when I suddenly heard numerous and forceful barks coming from the back porch. Leaving my work to investigate, I found Dodger nose-to-nose with an 8-inch earthworm. I don't know who was more frightened, the earthworm or Dodger. With my presence now near, Dodger felt brave enough to paw at the worm, then pick it up in his mouth. I don't think he liked the wiggling sensation, because he spit it out pretty quickly. Nevertheless, his tiny stump of a tail was wagging ninety-to-nothing, and it was clear he was happy as could be with his new discovery.

I've thought about that all morning. This world holds exciting new things for Dodger in the simplest places and most average days, and he is most willing to explore and experience them with our watchful eye over him.

Could it be that I've let the "yuckiness" of the old, mundane parts of life steal the vision and excitement for the new? Am I more content to be unhappy (barking madly) in my uncertainty than explore, taste and see the unfamiliar? Sure, the new experiences may bring wiggling sensations that I don't like, but at least I know that I'm under the watchful eye of the One who loves me most.

Darin and I will be leaving this Sunday afternoon to go on a two-week vacation. Part of our trip includes a Christian writer's conference I'll be attending at Ridgecrest in Asheville, North Carolina. To be honest, I'm terrified. People will be there as attendees who actually have books published, give autographs and travel around the globe to discuss their works. What in the world am I doing? Will I look like some novice with no clue? More accurately, am I even capable of grasping what they'll teach? Will I meet anyone to hang out with, or will I be so freaked out and overwhelmed I'll clam up and turn on my shy persona? Do the seminars that say "for beginners or pros" really mean for greenhorns like me or is that just to make me feel better so I'll attend?

Welcome to my world of insecurities.

Or, in my trepidation, will I explore, taste and see the unfamiliar? Sure, this new experience has already brought wiggling sensations that I don't like, but I've got to trust that I'm under the watchful eye of the One who loves me most. So, ready or not, here I go. (I sure hope this will taste better than an earthworm, though.)